A doctor and a lawyer
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their con- versation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"
"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill."
The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills.
When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.
The female skier Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo)...
The famous Olympic skier Picabo Street is not just an athlete, she is a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.
She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say,
A good clean joke is hard to find these days --- pass it on
The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs.
He asked the farmer, "What's up with these chickens?"
The farmer said "Well, everybody likes chicken legs, so I bred a three-legged bird. I'm going to be a millionaire." The man asked him how they tasted. The farmer said, "Don't know, haven't caught one yet."
There's too much youth; how about a fountain of smart.
My computer doesn't understand me!!
Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
F1: I just don't understand the attraction golf holds for men.
F2: TELL me about it! I went golfing with my ex one time, and he told me I asked too many questions!
F1: Well, I'm sure you were just trying to understand the game. What questions did you ask?
F2: I thought I asked legitimate questions.... like, "Why did you hit the ball into that lake?"