Deadhead in Texas
A deadhead is in Austin for spring tour and he goes into the hotel bar after the show and orders a beer. He remarks that the bar is 50 feet long.
"Sure", the bartender replies, "everything is bigger in Texas".
The bartender brings him his beer, and it must be 64 ounces! The bartender says "Yep, even the beers are bigger in Texas".
The head has to relieve himself after such a large beer, and asks the barkeep where the toilet is.
He's still a little addled from the show, and goes through the door on the left instead of the right and falls into the pool. Panicked, he yells, "don't flush, don't flush!"